Absent fathers

I once loved a man that grew up with an absent father

He was a beautiful man whose heart was broken by his hero

As a boy he wore his bleeding heart on his sleeve and grieved his dad 

But as a man, bitterness took over 

His heart hardened 

And he fought through life’s trials all by himself 

Figuring out how to be a man without a compass 

And because he was so vulnerable when he was younger

He believed men who cry are weak

So he perpetually neglected his pain 

And rejected my love 

He didn’t know how to love or how to be loved 

His father never showed him 

Because he didn’t know how…

He too grew up with an absent father

And so the man I once loved

Built walls around his heart

Cautiously avoidant

I still think about him sometimes 

I hope he isn’t still suffering in silence 

I hope his fear of closeness

Doesn’t lead to an inheritance of loneliness 

I hope his craving for love is quenched 
And what he couldn’t allow me to give 

He finds the courage to receive

I hope he has learned to unlearn and re-learn 

How to love

How to be loved

And everything else his father couldn’t teach him 

And finally, for both their sakes, I hope the man I once loved can forgive and end the cycle of absent fathers.

Sarah Kenyi © 2025